Been a while

 It's been a while since I blogged here.  Almost two months.

Tara says write 1000 words a day ... that's for the PhD thesis not the blog.  Writing about the PhD journey also helps.

I have been asking myself .... and reflecting.

It feels like I create a pattern, identify, then break it.  Asking myself what or how can I improve on what's already out there?  

There are some habits that seem engrained.  for example, not sure of what's happening for the day and the day goes on.  

I bring lunch - that's one thing I am sure of.  I have started vipassana but if I wake up after 6am, it is usually the 23-minute meditation followed by tea, breakfast, cook lunch.  I discovered if I have shower and then these things I tend to save 30 minutes somehow.  May be I muck around too much.

I have started Surya namaskars too, after funny muscles pull in the lower back.

This past one year has gone superfast, I can not believe it and I am super worried that if I don't' change my habits and keep doing what I am doing, it is NOT going to work.  Feels like a wakeup call.  I wish someone said these are the things I need to do and if I follow it I will complete it.   

After watching Tara's video - I got honest with myself - what has been working and what has NOT been working.  And moving forward I need to be task oriented not time oriented.  When I look at other students, I am in awe how much work they get done.  My supervisor's car is still at uni when I go back to my apartment and it is there in the morning when I get to the lab.  I don't know how that works or what time does she go home to sleep or not at all!?

I need to build solid robust habits that I cannot even trick or fool myself.

So what works or has been working well is getting up early (by 5:30am or 6am), then meditation and I am set for the day.  My lunch is planned a week in advance or the night before, my clothes are set too.

My room is almost always clean, I do the dishes the night before and have written what I am going to cook or have for breakfast and lunch, including socking the almonds.  I get to lab by 9 and I need to bring this to 8:30am.

Though I plan to write everyday it does not happen.  Why?  I give up too easily, feels like a chore, like a massive uninteresting task.

In the industry it was about firefighting and getting things done and getting a high from those fast accomplishments.  PhD is not like that, not at all .... it is like love, a commitment, a discipline, almost boring like meditation.

An important day for reflection

Today is an important day as I reflect, I asked myself what is it that I have learnt about relationships, life.   I am penning this down after nineteen years.

1. It is about communication - a dance 💃 in the conversation 

2. Disappointments are due to expectations 

3. Being playful, cheerful and happy are important

4. Encourage and inspire one another including myself. This is what feeds my soul.

5. Love and fun cannot be forced … whatever I do, do it out of love …. Actions out of love rather than force  

6. Remember to look after yourself

7. Physical, mental, emotional, spiritual safety starts with me

8. Communicate what works and what is not agreeable

9. Whatever has happened, is happening is all for the best

10. Pray, bless, wish well for all beings

11. Have faith, trust

12. Remove myself from situation where I do not feel safe or cannot contribute 

13. Look after yourself as much as you look after others or everyone else

14. Relax, have a good time, enjoy life, have fun

15. Triggers are an indication of what is still a trauma, look 👀 within and work things out

16. Praise and/or insults - just observe drop them. Be indifferent to both. Getting emotional only gets me entangled leading to suffering and misery 

17. Keep writing, keep writing ✍️ share the wisdom through my stories, poems, and creativity

18. Being grateful for all people, situations and how far I have come 

19. Keep moving forward and look 👀 forward to the fun, challenges, wisdom life has to offer me.

With love and gratitude 🙏🏼 

Jaishree Ravindran 

18 August 2024 😌

Book reviews for "Wish you were her by Sheradin Jobbins" and "The Sain, the surfer, the CEO" by Roin Sharma

 I really enjoyed this book, felt as if I was travelling (like a fly ont he wall) with Sheradin.

Moral of the story - believe in the universe and things will happen in your favour!  

Happy to share my thoughts on a recent book that I listened to. I loved this book "The saint, the surfer, the CEO" by Robin Sharma and started journaling the key questions as I have my hot cup of chai in the morning.

The questions

1. Who am I and whom would I love to be?

2. Hhow would I live this day if I knew today was my last day?

3. ⁠What do I have to be grateful for in life?

4. ⁠One thing to make my life extra ordinary

5. ⁠What can I do to make today fun?

6. ⁠How can I help someone today?

This is the same author (Robin Sharma) who talks about 90-90-1 rule - for ninety days for ninety minutes do one thing towards your goal! Yesterday, I sat down o work on researching articles and was blown away, I kept goign past 90 minutes. IT gave me momentum to keep going and had a great feelign of accomplishment for starting a task that I had been putting off for a loooonnnggg time.

Launching

 I am too excited, nervous, happy and all in one go.

Tomorrow - 11 May is my book launch online in Amazon!

A big part of me is very excited and another part is keeping me very grounded humble.

So it is about humble brag.

I now get it what it means to be famous and the amount of work that goes behind the screen when an actor/actress is projected on the big screen.  All the name and fame goes to them and yet there are so many people behind - the camera, make up, director, choreographers, script writers, etc.

My wish is this feeling keeps me in check ... 

Regret

 Have you ever regretted?

I regret for regretting the lost time.  There is no use in regretting it, yet, it keeps scratching my brain about regret.

If I was to be on my dying bed, I would regret for not having worked harder.  I would have regretted for not having put in all the hours of research, have a structured approach to life and fun.  As weird as it sounds, I would regret for not having enjoyed life as much.  

I am asking myself, why am I regretting over lost time?  What sensation am I feeling and where?

Today, I had a good catch up with friends and I learnt that I complain, complain a lot and compare a lot with my ideal 'industrial' days.  I realise I had such a luxurious and posh life or am I finding it was all great on the hind sight?

 I need to refine my achievement for the day, I realise I stretch myself too much and not feel happy for not completing it and not doing it.  

Which works better?  Positive reinforcement is on reward system - having a chocolate cake for completing the literature review.  Negative reinforcement is on doing things out of fear.

Apparently the negative is not good int eh long term as it can affect your memory.

At times, I feel I aim too high.  SO today, I am gogin to be realistic with the buffer times.

A oen hour walk is actually 15 minutes of prep and 5 minutes to wind down and remainign walk.  Though I walk for say 3km, it is actually the prepping, walking, and wind dwon.

YEs, it takees me two hours to wind down and sleep fromt eh moment I enter the room.

A side note, it was refreshing to hear my place is peaceful, is it because I meditate here, or have I become numb to my surreoundings, or was it something new for the other person?

Total minutes in a day = 24 x 60 = 1440 minutes

Even if I was to do the above I have 2 hours of FREE time each day.

I ask myself what would I really like to gain out of my PhD?

1. BEing grateful for the day
2. Being happy and at peace 
3. Lay foundation for a good life - health, wealth, intellect
4. Build on a healthy lifestyle
5. Enjoying the process, especially the research process
6. Have a process that delivers outcomes
7. Learn to manage funds and money
8. Throw myself into my work and enjoy the process
9. Not feel oh I am missing out on this or that, just do it!

At times I feel like a stretched rubber band that has been let go ... don't know where will I land yet the momentum, the exhilaration feels like fun!

Book Read so far and my views

 So far I have read the following books or rather audioboooks

Post Augsut 2022 - Flow, 

In 2023 - Atomic Habits

I just realised I logged out of Borrow Box where I had listened to lot of audiobooks and waiting for Jay Shetty's Audiobook 8 rules of Love.

The puzzle I was workign on, I brought it to university and it is great to see so many students pitch in and true team effort.

Being Economical with egg-o-know-mix or Egg-o-no-mix

I got very excited this morning.  I had a good sleep and a good walk and was looking forward to breakfast.

As I had bread and scrambled eggs, I realised how the same meals with different variation causes variation in texture and hence the mouth feel.  Scrambled eggs, or be it omelette, and then it occurred to me I could have Bombay duck - aka savoury french toast.  Same eggs, same bread - just tastes different!  and another variation is plain omelette and bulls eye - sunny side up!

If someone was to call me an expert I will happily take that title on for Korma Specialist - yoohoo!!

It has taken me few years to perfect the recipe and every time it amazes me!

Same ingredients for the paste the only changes with the variation of:

1. English vegetables - beans, carrot, peas and potato

2. cauliflower and peas

3. cauliflower and nutrella

4. nutrella and potato

5. above with or without tomato

6. above with almonds/walnuts / cashew nuts for the final thickening

7.  another variation is more green chilly and no chilly powder

Today's planning was menu fr the week.  Let me see how much stick with it or do I like to rebel against my own wishes!