Saturday, 18 January
As I was working in the lab, I had asked another research scientist how do they stay focused.
I realise I stay focused on tasks that are spontaneous, things that I enjoy thoroughly - example cooking. I take it as a challenge and enjoy by ensuring I am better at it than my previous attempts. Then why is research any different?
When I make a plan, be it a meal plan or go to the shops, I ensure and have had success at completing more than 90% of the time.
As we discussed, I realised and saw a very high work ethic and dedication by this scientist. I was amazed. I realised I do life (so called personal life – eating, sleeping, meditating, connecting with people) like. What can I apply to my research life like that? As we discussed, they plan and stick to the plan no matter what, and of course they love the tasks, actions all encompassing research. I could very well see that in my personal life and need that transformation for my research. That same love and passion and not taking things for granted. No matter how tired they are they keep going with the tasks. And if they haven’t achieved htat they ask “ Why was I not able to do that”. The question why is and can be daunting. I realised my fear “Why did you not do this and that?” I freeze when I interrogated like that. It feels like I have to justify for my survival, forget about thriving it become all about surviving – the question WHY.
I reflected and thought to myself …
Here were some good thinking from Shade Zahrai -
Rather than asking why did I not get up early, why did I not come earlier to the lab, why did I not meditate. I pause and rather than answering the why questions, only if I choose to reflect and think what or how can I make this better is one aspect of change. The other is going deeper in the why. I had 10 things on my list and I wanted to make the solutions ready, though I had it on the list, I did not do it. Though a super simple taks, I did nto do it. Why? I did not feel like it – yes it is a form of procrastination, and I asked again why to understand me better the answer that came was I can do it while waiting for other stuff like when the column is running or flushing, I can use that time to rinse the bottels and get my buffer ready – I am being efficient – doing all tasks while in the lab. I did nto see a point in doing something for the sake of doing it, not for the sake of ticking off the check list or to do list. I want to do it with a purpose.
This year I choose to finish what ever I am doing and be home by 7 or maximum 7:30pm.
I realise the pattern is I need a 12 hour break. The later I come to my apartment, the later I start the next day and finish later too. And over time when this accumulates, I give up the overly tolerated time.
It almost seems like a puzzle – the procrastination and arrival fallacy - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVS0iJK9WxY
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